Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not;
nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not;
unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will; not the world is full
of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The
slogan, 'Press on,' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human
race.
-Calvin Coolidge

Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics,

these are some questions people the world over are asking!



These questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website.



Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?( UK)

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.



Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.



Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water. . .



Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)

A: So its true what they say about Swedes.



Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)

A: Let's not touch this one.



Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)

A: What did your last slave die of?



Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big

country to your North . . . oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary.

Come naked.



Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.



Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.



Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is ...oh forget it.

Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight

after the hippo races. Come naked.



Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)

A: No, WE don't stink.



Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Canada? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.



Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)

A: Yes, gay nightclubs.



Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)

A: Only at Thanksgiving.



Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.



Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget it's name.

It's a kind of big horse with horns.(USA)

A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking

close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.



Q: I was in Canada in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Surrey, BC. Can you

help? (USA)

A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.



Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

Wow this makes the fourth post today! I am the badger, I am the badger.

Do you associate sections of your life with particular songs? Shitty in the dumps songs.... Sunshiny things are looking better songs?

Jot me a quick email what your favorite "life" songs are?

Sometimes I feel like something is gone here
Something is wrong here, I don't belong here
Sometimes I feel like a stranger in town
And I've lost what I found, it'll all turn around

-Uncle Kracker

Simplicity is a state of mind. - Charles Wagner

Y Tu Mama Tambien....

Day after day I'm more confused
But I look for the light through the pourin' rain
You know, that's a game, that I hate to loose
I'm feelin' the strain, ain't it a shame

CHORUS:
Give me the beat boys and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and DRIFT AWAY
Give me the beat boys and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and DRIFT AWAY

Won't you take me away

Beginin' to think, that I'm wastin' time
And I don't understand the things I do
The world outside looks so unkind
I'm countin' on you, you can carry me through

CHORUS

And when my mind is free
You know your melody can move me
And when I'm feelin' blue
The guitars come through to soothe me

Thanks for the joy you've given me
I want you to know I believe in your song
And rhythm, and rhyme, and harmony
You helped me along, you're makin' me strong

COURSE X2

Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart. - Confucius


Y Tu Mama Tambien....

Along the cool, sequestered vale of life. --Gray.



Y Tu Mama Tambien....

Ok, so here is some big news!! It looks like I have two new jobs. One full time, one casual or part time at best.

The first one is Chief Dispatcher at CMA, which will be in addition to being a flight dispatcher. (see attached job description A)

The second one is Cessna 182 pilot flying skydivers. Unfortunately this job is not 100% in the bag yet. I'll let you know in a week or two. (see attached job description B)

One pays approximately what I would be getting paid if I were full time back at Jazz. (In my eyes, it could be better considering the responsibility involved.)

The other will not likely pay for me to put Kraft dinner on my camping stove while I am back there.

One is a job, (which I will excel at, at all costs, short term sacrifice - long term return stuff)

The other is going to be really fucking cool!


Guess which one I'm more excited about!!


Job Description A:

CHIEF DISPATCHER

The Chief Dispatcher is a qualified dispatcher and maintains competency as per CASS 725.124

Responsible for:
„h Providing day-to-day administrative, functional and technical direction to the Flight Dispatch and Load Planning organizations on behalf of the Operations Manager (DFO).
„h Liaison with the Operations Coordination Department relative to the impact of Operational Control upon Operations Coordination activities and requirements.
„h The development, implementation and enforcement of operational control standards, policies and procedures pertaining to the Flight Dispatch function, in keeping with all Safety, Transport Canada, Corporate and Operations Coordination requirements.
„h Providing flight operational support through Dispatch services including, but not limited to, Flight Planning, Flight Watch, Weather Briefing, and communications as required by the Canadian Aviation Regulations section 725.20 and those applicable sections of the Flight Operations Manual.
„h Ensuring that all Flight Dispatch personnel are provided with adequate training, checking and route familiarization suitable to the position being held within the Flight Dispatch organization
„h Ensuring that Company flights are safely and efficiently planned, cleared, and monitored in accordance with established standards and regulations.
„h The initiation, maintenance, application and future development of Flight Dispatch Standard Operating Procedures Manual and all other manuals and documents relating to the Flight Dispatch function.
„h Development and implementation of standard operating procedures to ensure safe operations and compliance with the CARS, as directed by the Operations Manager.
„h Monitoring and measuring Flight Dispatcher performance relative to their knowledge and understanding of standards and procedures.
„h Maintaining complete and accurate records of Flight Dispatcher evaluations and training.
„h Providing work schedules which ensure adequate and efficient Flight Dispatcher staffing
„h Determining Flight Dispatcher training requirements and the development and delivery of training courses and criteria.
„h Managing and ensuring the ongoing integrity and operational capacity/capability of all Flight Dispatch technical support systems.
„h Preparing the operating and capital expenditure budgets relative to Flight Dispatch.
„h Liaison with external agencies which may affect Operations Co-ordination .
„h The receipt, validation and upgrading of airport reference information

FLIGHT DISPATCHER
Reports to: Chief Dispatcher

General
A Flight Dispatcher, qualified as per Canadian Aviation Regulations section CAR 705.110 and CASS 725.20 AND CASS 725.124 assigned the responsibility of exercising safe and efficient operational control over (name of air operator) flights in conjunction with the Pilot-in-Command, on behalf of the Operations Manager.

Responsible for:
Exercising operational control in a Complex Type B Operational Control System CASS 725.20.

„h Exercising operational control on a co-authority basis with the pilot-in-command, and for the joint responsibility of the safe efficient planning and monitoring of a flight.
„h The developing, reviewing, authorizing, issuing and revising, as required, of the Operational Flight Plan for all scheduled and nonscheduled flights inclusive of training and test flight operations, in keeping with Safety, Regulatory, Customer Service, and Corporate fiscal requirements.
„h Authorizing the release of an aircraft to operate in accordance with the terms and conditions established by the Operational Flight Plan.
„h Analyzing operational conditions and identify any opportunities that may constrain impede or benefit operational capabilities inclusive of, but not limited to weather, facilities, Air Traffic Control, and aircraft performance.
„h Performing Operational Flight Watch and for determining if changes to operational and meteorological conditions may affect the safety of flights within a prescribed area or on assigned routes, and for communicating those changes to the Pilot-in-Command.
„h Formulating and implementing revised Operational Flight Plans when conditions warrant, and for communicating the revised plans to the Pilot-in-Command.
„h Analyzing operational and meteorological conditions to evaluate and determine the safest and most efficient minimum fuel requirement.
„h When requested or deemed necessary, to provide the Pilot-in-Command with a thorough and professional flight crew briefing, covering all significant information which may impact the operation of his flight.
„h Soliciting, interpreting, and maintaining current flight and field condition reports to provide flight crews with the latest operational information.
„h Capturing up-to-date flight progress information of assigned flight movements (Flight Watch) and to ensure that the flight movement information is both current and accurate.
„h Providing Weight and Balance (if applicable) with a flight release, which includes total fuel requirements and aircraft weight limitations that maximizes revenue payload potential while satisfying all Safety standards.
„h Communicating to Air Traffic Control Services all Operational Flight Plan requirements.
„h Initiating Accident Alarm Procedures, and assessing and issuing Flight Incident Category Reports, as required, inclusive of the Corporate notification process and maintaining a written log during the incident.
„h Resolving with Maintenance Control, the pilot-in-command, Flight Operations Management Pilots as required, problems caused by any aircraft deviation from standard which may limit or impact flight operational capabilities, and to communicate any operational limitations to the Operations Co-ordination and respective operating Branches, as required.
„h Apprising Maintenance Control, Operations Coordination, other affected Flight Dispatchers, and Flight Operations Management Pilots if warranted, of any reported deviations from standard which occur during flight and which could impact down line scheduling integrity.
„h During irregular operations, congruent when practical with the Pilot-in-Command and in consultation with the Operations Coordination implementing flight delays when conditions warrant, recommending flight cancellations, and initiating alternative plans.
„h Initiating and coordinating airport handling when diversions to off line airports are required.
„h Communication with the Operations Coordination providing timely analysis of meteorological risk which may reasonably be anticipated to impact local and/or system operations including aircraft on layover.
„h Providing and communicating revised Operational Flight Plans to optimize revenue payload potential while maintaining adequate Safety standards.
„h Administering, managing, and implementing economic petroleum policies to maximize corporate profitability, subject to operational constraints and within proper Safety parameters.
„h Securing curfew breaks, as required, from Transport Canada during irregular operations.
„h Coordinating all planning aspects of both test and training flights.
„h Ensuring, on day-of-flight, that the Flight Dispatch function performs safe and efficient Operational Control in accordance with all Canadian and foreign governmental rules and regulations, Company flight operating manuals, and Corporate policies and procedures.
„h Liaison with the Chief Dispatcher, for the purposes of maintaining dispatch standard operating procedures and all applicable sections of the Company Flight Operations Manual.


Job Description B

Fly a Cessna 182 from Wakaw aerodrome up to 10,000 feet (24 minutes on the way up)

Tell the jumpers to jump.

Preform a controled spiral dive / slip back dowm to field elevation (4 minutes on the way down)

Try this...

Go to www.google.ca

Click the pages from Canada button

Search for "brent evjen" (Include the quotation marks.)



If you feel lucky, click the I'm Feeling Lucky button



Am I ever fucking cool!

Do you ever notice how "normal" people don't write/read poetry? I never would think about poetry except I hear it once in a while on TV. I am a product of television. :) I have an attention span of about three seconds.

Do lyrics count as poetry? I guess they do. Too bad so much "pop" music is such crap. I don't think Brittany Slut's lyrics have anything to do with poetry. But maybe for some people they do. I guess obviously if I think Uncle Kracker writes poetry, Brittany Slut can too..

On the subject of commercialism and crappy pop music, Marilyn Manson once said, "there is room for everyone".

I'm paraphrasing the shit out of it but you get the idea.



He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original.

- Alice Cooper, on Marilyn Manson

The Men That Don't Fit In
-Robert Service


There's a race of men that don't fit in,
A race that can't stay still;
So they break the hearts of kith and kin,
And they roam the world at will.
They range the field and they rove the flood,
And they climb the mountain's crest;
Theirs is the curse of the gypsy blood,
And they don't know how to rest.

If they just went straight they might go far;
They are strong and brave and true;
But they're always tired of the things that are,
And they want the strange and new.
They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
What a deep mark I would make!"
So they chop and change, and each fresh move
Is only a fresh mistake.

And each forgets, as he strips and runs
With a brilliant, fitful pace,
It's the steady, quiet, plodding ones
Who win in the lifelong race.
And each forgets that his youth has fled,
Forgets that his prime is past,
Till he stands one day, with a hope that's dead,
In the glare of the truth at last.

He has failed, he has failed; he has missed his chance;
He has just done things by half.
Life's been a jolly good joke on him,
And now is the time to laugh.
Ha, ha! He is one of the Legion Lost;
He was never meant to win;
He's a rolling stone, and it's bred in the bone;
He's a man who won't fit in.